Everyone knows Jennyâs number, itâs 867-5309. And if youâre like me, you sang it out loud.
Confucius, is said to have said, that âMusic produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without.â And he never heard a chord of rock ânâ roll.
I want to thank Tommy Tutone for the pure power pop pleasure their 1981 one-hit wonder "867-5309/Jenny" has brought me. That catchy song forms a part of my sonic identity. It is a track that you can hum and anyone can sing. It is a universally likable hit (reaching #4 on the charts) with a surefire afterlifeâa song thatâs upbeat with an easy to remember repetitive melody. Check and check.
I subscribe to the collective psychosis theory of humanity. Meaning that together, we collectively believe some really batshit crazy stuff, like patriotism, nationalism, beanie babies, fandom, and gods too. Rock ânâ roll is no different. It could be a summer hit or simply a throw away bubblegum pop hit, but when a great chorus with an infectious beat comes along, boom, weâre all "Hooked on a Feeling" Blue Swede (1974). The psychosis part, bordering on mental illness, also helps explain the likes of Dexy's Midnight Runners âCome on Eileenâ (1982), or Daniel Powterâs "Bad Day" (2005)
 Admittedly, Iâm a sucker for hit singles. And despite my force-fed Canadian content and Motown Muscle midwestern rootsâI grew up listening to CKLW-AMâs 50,000 watts of sound the âBig 8â put outâI have also always been a pushover for catchy British pop songs, enjoying their somewhat not-American sounding quality and freshness. Listening to hit singles, be they British, Canadian, American, or Latin, Hindi, Korean and Nigerian nowâa sort of musical siege immediately overtakes my emotions. Good hit songs are easy to be enthralled with and etched into our brainsâeasy to learn and impossible to forget. How can you not groove to David Essexâs âRock Onâ (1974) or vibe to Katrina and The Waves âWalking on Sunshineâ (1983). Each a one-hit wonder that seemed to capture the zeitgeist of the times. Hit singles are truly fabulous creations, with some becoming legendary. (BTW: In the 80s, following MTVâs launch when the Buggles âVideo Killed the Radio Starâ (1980) was shown, we reached peak one-hit wonder. But we wonât know if TikTok influencers have killed the music industryâs hit single model for a few years. Literally, creative destruction at work.)
By their very definitions, one-hit wonders come and go. Quickly. Tommy Tutoneâs 15-minutes of fame lasted exactly 3 minutes 45 seconds. We all know the clichĂŠs used in describing the phenomena that sends a new artist with a new song capturing lightning in a bottle and skyrocketing to the top of the charts: beginnerâs luck, a novel sound, a rookie sensation, right sound at the right time, etc. Now Iâm not a musician, canât carry a tuneâno rhythmic meter, Iâm toldâand am regularly admonished for even attempting to carpool karaokeââNo dad, please donât wreck it for me.ââbut isnât music at its essence all about eliciting an emotional response in us listeners. It is art, after all. And somehow, successful musicians reorganize those finite 12 notes with some phrases, add a bit of personal attitude and energyâŚand poof, they created something infectiously contagious. The good kind of infectious contagion!
Obviously, musicians tickle our brainâs pleasure circuitry with their hitsâand sometimes their misses, as Joni Mitchell, called hers. Research bears this out: Hit singles are said to deviate ever-so-slightly from our expectations in predictable chord structure (Whatever that is?), creating a novel sound, something new, something freshâa âharmonic surpriseâ. This surprise releases dopamine, like gaming, cocaine and sexual release, that improves our mood and reduces anxieties, inducing pleasure and joy. Sometimes for even longer than the 3 minutes and 45 second length of the song too.
Madison Avenue knows all this. In fact, I blame ad creators for many of our collective earwormsâscientists call them âinvoluntary musical imageryâ that are downright intrusive. But the very first pop songs were musical jingles, radio commercialsâ15-second pop songs. Cue âPlop, plop, fizz, fizzâŚâ, âBreak me off a piece of thatâŚâ, âMm-mm good, mm-mm goodâŚâ and âI wish I was anâŚ" earworms we all sadly know. Ads and pop songs have been married together ever since. Why? Because familiar songs, repetitive hits especially, elicit a positive collective emotional response. Did you know that in an obvious match made in heaven, Sting refused to allow a deodorant to use The Policeâs ditty "Don't Stand so Close to Me" (1980); but later let Jaguar use his song "Desert Rose" (1999) in an ad. Iâd take a fleet of cars over a box of pit juice anytime.
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And by the way, the cure for earworms is apparently one of two things: either listening to Led Zeppelinâs âKashmirâ (1975)âclocking in at 9 minutes and 41 seconds, not a hit singleâor chewing gum first thing in the morning. Pickâem, fact, and the research bears this out!
And yetâŚone-hit wonders, those bite-sized chunks of easily digestible songs, have a stigma, a negative connotation. By definition, a one-hit wonder is a musical act who hit the charts with a popular single, but never chart again. Trendy fade, flash-in-the-pan, hot one day but forgotten the next, dumb luck, right sound at the right time, the fast food of music, etc., are the normal clichĂŠs. One-hit wonder musicians flew too close to the sun and made us all swoon, once. They enjoyed momentary success but couldnât overcome the dreaded musical Sophomore Slump.
Reviving the past has always been a powerful force in rock ânâ roll, and thereâs been an uptick of nostalgia in our streaming diets too, which now accounts for 70% of all music consumption. I notice this every time I enter a karaoke loungeânot to sing, but enjoy. One-hit wonders are some of the most popular karaoke songs: Natalie Imbrugliaâs âTornâ (1997), Gloria Gaynorâs âI will Surviveâ (1978), The Proclaimers â500 Milesâ (1987), The Human Leagueâs âDonât You Want Me?â (1981), and Bonnie Tylerâs achy âTotal Eclipse of the Heartâ (1983), are always wannabe diva favorites.
Nostalgia and throwbacks aside, it is not easy to have a hit single, and we should cherish any hit. When you cross The Billboard Hot 100 charts history with Spotifyâs* new metrics, you realize how hard it really is: Just over 27,000 songs have graced the Billboard Hot 100 charts since 1958, with only 1,077 of them ever reaching No. 1âa scant 3.8 percent success rate. (BTW: A No. 1 hit stays atop the charts for only 16.5 days on average.) Now documentation varies, but it is estimated that there are over 95 million songs out there that is growing at a astounding clip of 60,000 new songs a day! Thatâs a lot of music, so Iâll do the math for you: Musicians have a less than 3% chance that their released song will even chart, let alone another 1 in 1,000 chance that their musical breakthrough will then chart-bust its way straight to No. 1.
Even those crazy odds-against donât tell the whole story and are grossly misleading, because we all know about the 80/20 rule: 80% of hits are made by 20% of musicians. So, most acts never have a chance when you consider that each musician that did successfully beat the odds and land their song on the charts, will add another track, maybe many moreâDrake has 260, so far!âto the Hot 100 list. Those few are the very opposite of one-hit wonders. We live in a winner-take-all world where success breeds success. Think: Elvis, The Beatles, Elton John, The Eagles, Stevie, Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, Madonna, WhitneyâŚand now think Rihanna, Adele, Bieber, Jay-Z, Swift, Usher, Eminem, Lil Wayne, Drake and The Weeknd.
Given those long getting struck by lightning odds, we should celebrate anyâokay, not any**, but manyâbreakthrough musicians that achieve one-hit wonder status with their fresh exciting sounds. Novel is good, it feeds into our shiny object syndrome, squirrel. Our eyesâears in this caseâeasily diverted by something sexier. And who doesnât like sexier?
Donât feel bad for one-hit wonders either. For some, their singular hit becomes their signature song on which they make a career out of playing county fairs, clubs and casinos. Being a one-hit wonder does not mean they didnât have a successful music career, because many acts do without ever achieving a chart hit, let alone a No. 1 hit: Nirvana, Bruce, The Who, Led Zeppelin, Dylan, and Shania Twain, have never had No. 1 hit singles. Also interesting, one-hit wonders are not relegated to only obscure artists either, because Hendrix, The Grateful Dead and Lou Reed, are technically considered one-hit wonders. Many of my personal favorite musical artists are one-hit wonders too: Simple Minds, Nic Lowe, Sinead OâConnor, Talk Talk, Joan Osborne, Fiona Apple and Macy Gray, to name a few.
So, all hail the one-hit wonders, and the wonders of the hit singles everywhere.
Did you know that September 25th is National One-Hit Wonder DayâŚWhat will you be listening to?
My 25 Memorable One-Hit Wonder playlistâŚ
* Please forgive me, this was written a few days before the Canadian Neil Young taking on Swedenâs Spotify over American Joe Roganâs ignorance brouhaha broke out. Â
** I am alluding here to the any being either novelty songs, ala âMonster Mashâ (1962), âThe Streakâ (1974), âConvoyâ (1976) and âDisco Duckâ (1976), or dance craze hits like âThe Hustleâ (1975), âY.M.C.Aâ (1978), âFunky Townâ (1979), âLambadaâ (1989), âMacarenaâ (1995), âMambo No. 5â (1999), âHarlem Shakeâ (2013) and âGangnam Styleâ (2012).
Thanks for giving me your attention for a few moments, it is the most precious thing you have, and I appreciate it. Be well.
William D. Chalmers Š 2022 GreatEscape Adventures, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Amazing how I can sing along without a thought. Thanks for the musical thought process, itâsâŚ
âWhat I Like About You.â
Ok you know what you didâŚ. Have to go listen to Kashmir nowâŚ